To the women who so strongly desire to be moms, those that have miscarried or those on the journey of infertility know that if feelings arise this weekend it’s okay. Let yourself feel what you need to feel. Maybe you’re thinking about if your baby would’ve been a girl or a boy or what phase of life he or she would’ve been at now, or maybe how you would’ve celebrated your first Mother’s Day as a family. Maybe you just simply miss the baby you were once carrying even if you never met him or her.
I’ve had all of those thoughts this week and I at first felt crazy for that until I realized that it’s okay. All those thoughts of what if and all the feelings are okay. We loved and connected with those babies from the day we knew we were carrying them. I sometimes struggle with putting my feelings so openly out there to share but I know undoubtedly that someone can relate and someone needs to know that she’s not alone and that she’s not crazy for feeling how she feels. She needs to know that even though the hurt doesn't go away, it doesn't define her and it doesn't have to steal her joy. She needs to know that she Will. Be. A. Mom. So maybe it’s not the Mother’s Day we thought we’d be having but remind yourself of what all you’ve made it through, the strong woman that you are, the people who so lovingly support you and the fact that God will give you the desires of your heart in His perfect timing. We don’t have to have it together all the time. That’s why God allows us to lay our burdens at His feet and let Him do what He do perfectly does and work on our behalf.
This weekend I choose to celebrate my mom and my mother in love and my sisters and all the amazing women in my life setting an unbelievably, beautiful example for me on the kind of mom I KNOW I will be one day. I choose to let them know how I love and appreciate them.
And while I wait with a heart full of hope, “I will remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.”